not last weekend the weekend before it was my stepdad's birthday.

he wanted it in our backyard, and to have a big one because hes like 40 now. like i care at all.

so he invited all is looser friends and my mums family but my cool cousin who goes to uni didnt come. it was going to be all old people, and like just hanging out outside and listening to shitty old fucking music like 'you can leave your hat on'.

then my stepdad said it was going to be a bbq and i said 'why are you being such an asshole you KNOW im vegeatarian' and he was like 'its my birthday and people like going to bbqs. i'll make you a vege burger' and i was all 'thats not the point dont be such a dick your going to be sencelessly killing all these animals for nthing' and the i kept hoping and hoping and hoping it would rain and his stupidass bbq would be totally a disaster.

and it did rain, and at first i was all happy, but then it just meant that they were all INside, and they got pizza and roast chicken instead, so i spent the night sitting on the roof freezing my ass off to get away from them, and noone even went to see if i was ok. THEN to make matters worse, we've STILL got all this meat in the freezer and they're having meat every night and i can't go to the freezer without having to see all these carcases of dead animals. it almost made me cry a little bit and then my stepdad told me to be a man. he's such a fucking asshole.

sorry i havnt written in awhile. i feel like theres no point to anything. so ive written this poem. it's called 'no point to anything':

no point to anything

sitting in a dark room
looking out a window
i see a baby in a pram
the hope in its eyes warms me
the possibility of the world
in its new blue eyes
but then i see its mother
and her dark dead eyes
show me a wasted life
and i realise,
there's no point to anything.


i think its alot moodier and darker than alot of my other work. but yeah.

pretty soon ill tell you about my asshole stepdad's bitrhday party. it sucked.